Juggling bedtime with multiple kids

Juggling bedtime with multiple kids? I see you. With 4 kids and often doing the bedtime routine solo I can totally relate to this tricky situation.

I’ll be the first person to say that it’s quite a task to get all the kids into bed at the right time (the right time for each of them). So here’s some tips to make bedtime with multiples a whole lot easier.

You can manipulate one of your child’s schedules if you need to:

Trying to get bedtimes to line up at the exact same time for children on two or three completely different schedules is quite difficult to achieve, especially if you want to nurture their own individual sleep needs so that you don’t experience the negative affect of a “set bedtime” that isn’t necessarily the “right bedtime”. 

So sometimes it’s actually easier to manipulate one of your child’s schedules so that you can have a staggered bedtime but also a bedtime that is right for each child. For example if you have a younger baby on multiple naps you might cap one of their daytime naps so that you can manipulate the time of their last nap of the day helping you to achieve a bedtime that is either a little earlier or a little later than your toddler depending on what works well and is easier for your family. Or you might allow your baby to take a longer last nap or an extra power nap at the end of the day so that you can get your toddler into bed before the baby. Having a staggered approach to bedtimes can help you to achieve the needs of each child but also remove the chaos that can come with trying to get both or multiple children to sleep all at the same time. I currently cap the twins nap and manipulate it so that they are always in bed by 6:30pm which allows me to have 30 minutes or so with the boys doing some homework or reading books together – this works so well for us because it means the twins have gone off to sleep and me and the boys can share some time together with less chaos around.  

Keeping older siblings occupied / involved if the baby needs to go to bed first:

If you have a younger child that cannot be unoccupied while you get the baby to sleep then the best thing to do is include them in the baby’s bedtime routine. Many toddlers LOVE having this responsibility of helping get the baby to sleep. Your toddler can help with things like; finding you a nappy, reading a bedtime story to the baby, helping to bath the baby.

Another thing that can work really well is having a pre-bedtime busy box! A box with different / special things in it that will help to keep your toddler occupied long enough for you to get the baby settled into bed for the night.

Keeping the baby settled if your toddler needs to go to bed first:

If the twins were going to bed later than the boys I found it really helpful to have the twins either in the carrier while I zipped around getting the boys sorted or close by to us in their bouncers so they could still see us and feel part of the boys routine. You could also set up a safe space for your younger baby to play, in a play pen or a portacot with some soft and safe toys in it.

If the timing does work where both or multiple children are due for bed at the exact time:

Do the routine together. Get them in the bath or shower together. Have all the PJ’s ready to go in one room. Choose 1 or 2 books that you can read together in one place and then when you tuck each child in they can have their special moment for kisses and snuggles on their own.

If you have children room sharing and they are due for bed at different times:

In this case you would do your pre-bedtime routine for the child that is going to bed later outside of their room and this works totally fine. It’s the familiarity of the routine that helps to prepare your child for sleep time so it’s okay if the routine isn’t always in their bedroom. Have their sleep bag/sleep suit, night nappy, comforter and any other sleep items out of the room so that you can get them ready for bed before taking them to bed. For me, if one of the twins needs to go to bed earlier than the other I dim the hall light as I am walking them to their room and we have a goodnight song and big cuddle before we enter. I also remind that we have to put up our finger stop signs 🤫to be quiet because their sibling is already sleeping. Have the house as dark as possible and white noise on so that entering the room with the little one who is going to bed later isn’t going to wake the little one who is asleep.

When you have multiple children learning to sleep independently from a younger age can be necessary:

I have 4 kids and twins so I know what it’s like to sit in a bedroom trying to get the babies to sleep and being stressed and guilty about my boys who needed me too. You cannot be in two places at once so sometimes the only way to meet the needs of every kiddo is to encourage your baby to fall asleep independently, when age appropriate. Our 4-24 Month Slumber Program includes our gentle and complete approach to supporting a baby to learn how to self-settle. This doesn’t mean walking out of the room and leaving them to cry it out – that’s not our approach. If you are looking for a fully responsive approach to teach your baby how to self-settle without ‘crying it out’ our program is the perfect solution.  

If bedtime has become too tricky because each child needs your support to get to sleep and it’s taking a long time or room sharing is challenging because one child doesn’t settle or sleep well, view our Slumber Programs. Our Slumber Program will help to ease bedtimes, have your little one falling asleep happily, all on their own and sleeping beautifully. 

Katie xx